ABOUT THE PHOTOGRAPH AND TITLE

THIS PROFILE PICTURE IS A PAINTING BY SAMUEL BAK. THE TITLE IS "INTERRUPTION". THIS BLOG IS ABOUT CHILDHOOD ABUSE, THE DESTRUCTION IT CAUSES AND HOW I FEEL A CONNECTION TO HOLOCAUST SURVIVORS.

POETRY

OUR POETRY

A FLOWER BECAME A WEED



 

SEARCHING

Confusion and pain,
Tears falling like torrential rains.

Restlessly searching--
      I look within, only to find
      Brokenness and sorrow,
      Emptiness and darkness.

Endlessly searching--
     I encounter less than nothing.
     No spirit or soul, nor will to live.
     An aching void, swelling inside a wretched heart.

Aimlessly searching--
     Lost within a self-made vacuum
     Slowly dying as life continues on,
     Out of my reach because of paralyzing fear.

Longingly searching--
     For a past love that was never real,
     To calm my fears and ease my sorrow.
     Distressingly aware of the uselessness of my quest.

Desperately searching--
     For her,
     The one who brought me into this world,
     But never gave me life.

Confusion and pain--
Mother, please let me be born again.


Randolph
2/27/1994








ENTOMBED

Crouching down, hiding in the shadow of a deep ravine,
the ground beneath me is shifting and unstable.
In this desolate darkness, I am haunted by your eyes,
glaring and empty, eyes not befitting a mother's face.
The harsh coldness of your touch, its unspeakable pain,
causes a violent avalanche of memories.
Defenseless and paralyzed by fear,
suffocating as the falling earth entombs me,
I am abandoned in the rubble by you, my only hope.
Desperately alone, I await your return,
crying in vain for you to find me
inside this stone grave of your creation.
I ache for your love, so long forlorn,
to finally deliver me from this slow, painful death
of living a life entombed.

Randolph
7/1/1995

3 comments:

  1. Jyoti, Thank you for your comment. Also, I appreciate you joining my blog. It is very different! Can be very confusing living with our problems!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. The search...the pain...
    So very deep and disturbing...
    Intense!

    ReplyDelete